Seanbaby: As far as I've pieced together, here is Chairman's masterplan: STEP 1: Build a gun that can make chairs, keep away from Twinkies. Also, enjoy bowtie. STEP 2: Steal more chairs from chair shipment. STEP 3: If no shipment can be found, demand directions from Spider-Man, who may possibly be in charge of coordinating long haul chair shipments. STEP 4: Watch the ladies and money roll in. Mr. Fish: Glub. I'm glad I'm a fish, because this is fucking crazy. Let me tell you something: I look at the pictures in enough gun magazines to know that building one that transforms people into talking chairs is a pain in the ass, even if you have a (gay) purple top hat. Glub. In fact, it's so hard to do, and so INSANE, that it makes me wonder why he didn't just make a gun that can transform someone into a giant dancing candy bar that gives free blowjobs. There is NO WAY that could be more complicated. And here's a tip for any pansies with chair-making guns: if your gun makes chairs, there's really no reason to hijack shipments of chairs. You can make them, remember? Orville Redenbacher doesn't break into your house and steal your popcorn, you stupid shit. The Chairman would have saved himself some time if STEP 2 of his plan was "Open fire on orphanage shipment; sit on former children." Glub. But that only brings up a more important question to the author-- how many heads are in your refrigerator, you crazy idiot? Luke Cage: Sweet Christmas, why magician cracker collectin' so many damn chairs? How many asses this motherfucker have?