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Fist of the North Star. If you were unfortunate enough to have ever played this game, I'm sorry. You controlled Ken, the master of Gento Karate, as he did complicated things like walk and fight. Sadly, this intricate plotline was actually pretty faithful to the Fist of the North Star story. You were constantly being attacked by the same two shirtless mohawk guys, and unidentifiable objects would fall out of the sky at you. And while you were trying to get out of the way of those things, some of the bad guys would occasionally slide across the screen like muppets trying to trip you. But don't worry, if you get killed, it's a welcome excuse to stop playing.

Ken has a punch and a kick, versatile attacks with the exact same range, and both of them kill any bad guy in one hit. The only difference is that the punch makes people explode. And not in a funny cartoon way. I mean, they grotesquely arch their backs as their internal organs start leaking out right before their entrails are splattered all over the street. This graphic carnage is for mature gamers only. Or kids that like to eat snot, turn their eyelids inside out, make fart jokes, or enjoy tearing the legs off of spiders.

Hey. You're... you're exploding. What the fuck is going on here?

Graphics: 0 The graphics, appropriately, are as disgusting as a human body exploding.
Fun: 0 The whole game is exactly the same crap. If you can talk someone into actually playing this game, hit reset periodically to send them back to the beginning. They probably won't notice.
Flying Human Chunk Rating: 8 "The chunks of exploding people had good velocity, and held their shape well on the descent. However, they did lose a couple tenths of a point on artistic interpretation. The judges didn't feel they were let in on what the flying organs were feeling. What do you think Matt?"
"Well, Jimmy, I agree. I thought those entrails were having a lot of fun out there. I liked the curl of the large intestines, and that liver really hit the sidwalk with authority. Overall, an outstanding performance from all of the competitors. This has been one of the finest Beefy Splat Olympics in decades."
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