Height: 5'8" Weight: 512 lbs. Hair: Red Eyes: Blue/Grey Blood Type: A+ Zodiac: Dragon/Cancer Cybernetics: Class B, type III, non-organic upgrade. Skin/bone augment: High grade carbon steel reinforcement Memory augment: 512 MB Muscle augment: Electrostatic cabling, high density - max press: 2200 lbs. Martial Arts - Tang Soo Do, Aikido, Jermanese: Jumping Insect, Heaven and Earth, Ai'sen (Berserker) Weapons - Eddie and the black bat, bo staff, pool stick, vampire stick, nunchaku Interests - martial arts, artificial intelligence, robotics, aeronautics and astronautics, molecular biology, neurobiology, chemical-, electrical-, and metalurgical-engineering, comics, video games, farming. Likes - blondes, plaid skirts, accents, action figures, scars, non-conformism, muscle tone, beer, vodka, tuna, frozen yogurt, mariachi, Cibo Matto, Miguel, and everything else from Mexico and Japan. Dislikes - sexism, short hair, prissiness, Tipper Gore, suburbs, small dogs, fashion designers, people who baby their kids, whiny kids, knick-knacks and people who love them, and that fucking "Footprints" story every Christian over the age of 30 has on their wall. Weaknesses - hot environments. Also, slow, clumsy, a bad liar, and a romantic sap. History - Schizophrenic with unknown past. May either be from modern rural America or ancient Jermania, or both.

Day Job: I honestly do work on Artificial Intelligence research at a mysterious, cutting edge, government-funded facility staffed by some of the brightest scientists in the world - and I have to say, it's almost entirely boring and non-challenging. I haven't seen one terrorist or ninja spy, and try having a beer with a particle physicist. Celebrity you most want to have a beer with: Sean Ysuelt, the former bass player from White Zombie - now known as Devilina, the lead guitarist in Fabulous Monsters. But my dates to the Oscars will be Traci Lords, Natalie Portman, and Michelle Yeoh - assuming we make at least three movies which get us to the Oscars. The movie you'd show to aliens to prove the worth of our planet: Flash Gordon. Not only is it a masterpiece, but it also shows the aliens that if they don't find our planet worthy, we'll just kick their asses. I have more charm and savoire-faire than you, and I'll prove it by beating you up!

It's the apocalypse. Describe you and your lover/partner's appearance. Me: Hair/Beard: nasty "I haven't washed my hair in 20 years" dreadlocks, with broken glass, rusty nails, wood screws, etc. jammed in. Teeth: filed to points. Tounge: cut out years ago. Possibly by me. Left leg: sexily torn pantyhose. Right leg: hair. Arms: bare, with lots of indistinct knife scars meant to be tattoos. Long fingernails. Chest: some kind of leather vest or possibly animal skins. Front torso: STOP sign. Back torso: Mack truck grill. Crotch: loose skirt made from hood ornaments, over a loincloth. Weapons and gadgets: primary - right leg of mannequin. Has the missing half of my pantyhose. The waist joint is capped with a spiked dog collar. secondary - billiard balls, grappling hook made from umbrella, assorted pipes. vehicle: "Tiamat", 1973 Chevy Nova, painted black (including the windshield and other windows). Lover/partner: the rest of the mannequin. Usually dressed in either girl scout uniform, catholic or japanese school girl uniform, or teddy. I get mad if anyone mentions her missing leg or that she doesn't talk or move much.