Joel Sanfil is the first male Reader Babe, even though I've yet to see him remember to put on his pants. I can't help thinking how insane it has to be for him in the morning, standing in front of his closet in a towel thinking, "Thong with tie... no.... thong with mayonnaise on my face... no.... thong with leather jacket?"

Joel has a huge collection of more pictures like these on his beauty website, Joel's Salon. You'll learn how to take off your pubic hair, what kind of jacket goes with bikini briefs, and things like this:
If you are dating a man who is married, believe me, you are far better off wearing the exact same shade of lipstick that his wife always wears.

This way, if any of your lipstick rubs off on his shirt or pants while you are sexually pleasuring him, his wife won't be the least bit suspicious.

She'll simply think that it is her lipstick and not yours that she sees on his things the next time she's doing the laundry!

Another cool little "cover-up" trick you can use is to always apply a clear, waterproof coat of mascara over your regular mascara.

By doing this, you will be "sealing in" your regular mascara and making it a lot less prone to smudging or coming off all over your lover's underwear.

Believe me, both Kathie Lee Gifford and Elizabeth Dole have used these little "cover-up" tricks of mine more than once in their lives... with stunning, smashing results!
He doesn't just give advice to sneaky housewives either:
A woman's beauty is everything! What grown man in his right mind would rather watch a football game on television than be with his wife or girlfriend or lover?

It is purely a little sissy thing to do, this football game watching on television.

I myself have better things to do... like devoting my entire life to beauty and giving you little beauty secrets you can use.

Women are smarter, more sensual, and far more beautiful than men!
You're not going to catch me agreeing with Joel very often, but it doesn't matter how bad a hangover is, when I read the weird shit he sends me, it's impossible to be in a bad mood. Here's one of the notes he wrote me a couple weeks ago. It's about how much he wants to have sex with an old lady, so believe me when I say: "I don't know why or how, but Joel fucking rules."

Hey Sean!

Very cool. You got a really great site. I get quite a kick out of it and there are not many sites I get a kick outa, believe me!

Hey, you gotta check out this site:

Mamie Van Doren is 66 years old. She is now a Hollywood Icon. A real-live Hollywood living legend. She made zillions of bad films in the 50s and early 60s (soooo bad, that one, all about smoking pot in High School in 1958 is now becoming a true cult classic!!!!!! It is called High School Confidential.

Anyway, if you visit Mamie's website, you will see she has another of my sites, listed right near the top. (yes, I am the Madman of Hollywood!!) Mamie has taken a real-live honest to goodness liking to me!!! Woo woo...

Anyway, Mamie is a total freak-out and a total trip.. I am sure when you visit her site and get a load of her scandalous, outrageous pictures, you will see what I mean.

Her site is super fantastic for any movie buff who is into the "hollywood history" thing.. plus seeing a 66 year old fabulous, groovey, totally cool woman posing nude!!!!!

Hey, I was thinkin.. don't you think Mamie would make a great READER BABE? Like, maybe, the best? Check out her site and tell me what you think.

I myself, Sean, am freakin over Mamie..... I would gladly hop into the sack with this fabulous, fantastic 66 year old woman... I think she is beautiful..!!!! Tell me, am I going nuts??

your cyber buddy

Do it, Joel!  Do it! Go to Joel's Salon

Go back to the Reader Babes Page

November 9th, 1999 - Joel Madness!
My newest affiliate, pantless Joel Sanfil from Joel's Salon, has released this statement to the public regarding the new Team-Up:
For immediate release
Date: 11-09-99

Joel Sanfil, former male exotic dancer and owner of the most sensual beauty salon on the World Wide Web, JOELSSALON.COM, is pleased as punch to announce his most recent affiliation with SEANBABY.COM

Said the thong-cladded Joel early today while drinking his usual midnight snack consisting of two bloody marys at a well-known local Hooters Night Club in Amherst, NY:

"Sean Baby is one of the coolest dudes I know on the Internet. You've seen my link on a zillion beautiful women's pages all over the internet... Joan Elizabeth Llloyd, Dr. Susan M. Block, Lori Victoria Braun,... the list goes on and on... but never have I been so honored or so pleased as to have my link up at"

Since the initiation of his site,, an awful lot of men have offered to link to Joel SanFil. Joel, oftentimes called "the male Cindy Margolis of the Internet", has always politely declined.

Today, however, in a move which has apparently caught everyone with their pants and panties down, Joel announced the reason for his "reversal":

"Hey, what can I say? Sean Baby rocks. This doesn't necessarilly mean I want to have sex with him or go to a retro drive-in movie show and share popcorn with him... all it really means at this point is that we are LINKED.

"Geesh, Sean Baby is kickin' and I am glad to be affiliated with his site."