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Hey Batman, you might be taking this voting thing too seriously. Is your vote on the county commissioner position really worth revealing your secret identity over?

I tried to vote once, but what's the point? There's never anything worth voting on. There's never a checkbox by a question like "Should you be able to see tits on TV?" No, there's just positions like City Council Chair #4 with some names you've never heard of by them. Bob Greenlick wants reelected as County Agriculture Correspondent? Fine, Bob. Have it, whatever it is. I'm sure you'll be very important to zoning restrictions and whatever.

Why can't we vote for things that will actually affect us? I don't how a City Council chair #4 could affect my life even if he wanted to. They should have a ballot at McDonalds.

Who should we put at the front counter?
The hot chick in the back making fries
The kid with the speech impediment and half a face.