|Top Man. The whirling dipshit. His whole evil level is filled with
stupid little top men and tops you can ride, and by the time you reach
him, you should be fully saturated with the theme. But when you get this
deadly robot's weapon, Mega Man has the awesome power of the Top Spin.
Watch out, Wily, we're using your own maniacal genius against you now!
We can spin, you little bitch! You'll find this spinning manuever will
get you out of many tight spots. For example, when Boogie Man stage of
enter, and Mega Man challenged to ultra dance contest, break down Top
Spin for ultimate disco power of show!
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: If there's a trick to beating this
monstrosity of a robot master, I haven't found it. Just try to stay
away from his awesome arsenal of deadly spinning tops. Remember your
training. And good luck.
||Shadow Man. I guess he is a mysterious master of ninjitsu or
something. It didn't seem to me that he had anything to do with shadows, but
I'm sure that if he was to get in the way of some light, he would cast a
shadow just like everything else. He throws little stars at you, and
he's so proud of this exotic talent, he wears one of them on his
forehead. But don't give him all the fashion design credit. Hard Man
had a big part in the creation of this costume that I'm sure everyone
will agree, screams "shadow."
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: I know you've been dying to find a use for
your Top Spin. Here's your chance! Show Shadow Man how a real robot boy
can spin! Yay!
|Spark Man. He looked like a spark plug. This evil robot was a real
kid at heart. When he wasn't watching over his secret spark room for one
of Wily's world domination plans, he and Elec Man used to get
together and fly kites in the rain for hours. And after they went inside
for a couple of warm cups of battery acid and marshmallows, they'd run
along the carpet and zap the shit out of each other. How the two of them
would frolick in their youth. Never lose your inner child, Spark Man!
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Wrap the condoms you picked up from the Hard
Man stage around your feet to insulate you. Now, throw a bucket of water
on Spark Man's head and watch the fireworks! When the smoke clears, try
to ignore the smell of burning plastic long enough to get the ultra
useful Spark Shot.
||Rush Jet. When people heard Mega Man was getting a dog, a lot of
them said, "Yeah, but will you be able to ride it?" That was a question
that Mega Man was pleased to answer as he hopped onto his dog and flew
around the room spreading joy and happiness to all. Rush, the loyal dog,
only shows a hint of the deeply repressed rage just waiting to explode.
And as Mega Man continues his flight in blissful ecstacy, Rush silently
plots. The day will come when he will be no boy's
|Seanbaby Man. Although creditted with being the
prettiest robot master, he is also the deadliest. If you can make it
through his secret disco stage, you'll have to face his Glitter
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: When Mega Man enters, Seanbaby Man will try
to make him cry with his insults. If you picked up the Apathy Ray from
Pot Man, you can counter this. But since there is little to no chance of
beating Seanbaby Man, I would recommend you just hit reset and not go to
his secret stage if you're interested in staying alive.
From: Casey Bird
Hi, I saw your page. Pretty funny. However, how do you get seanbaby or is he just a myth?
||Pharaoh Man. This is another robot that has a complicated history.
He originally was called Pheremone man, and he could release sexual
chemicals that made our little blue boy into a man.... but Capcom thought
it was too risque for American audiences. So they turned him into some
King Tut guy with a generic weapon called the Pharaoh Shot or something
like that. However, watch for the original Pheremone Man to come out in
his own game called, "Pheremone Man Alpha: The Scent of
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Beating Pharoah Man is a difficult
task, especially when he puts an ancient Egyptian curse on you. It
will make you see nothing but strange flashing characters and
colors, and it can only be cured by turning off your Nintendo and
blowing on the cartridge.
|Ring Man. After the mildly attractive robot girl, Roll, declined
Wily's proposal of marriage, he vowed revenge by building this thematic
evil robot master. However, when he sent Ring Man out to destroy Roll,
the two immediately fell in love and went on an international shopping
spree after selling Ring Man's ammunition to local pawn shops. I
called Wily to get his comments and he screamed, "Bah! My plan has been
foiled! But they cannot stop my force of evil robot miners! Wa ha ha! *
Slam!*" I fear for our safety.
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: This is the nastiest evil
robot fuck head you will ever fight. If I knew an easy
way to fight him, I probably wouldn't be sitting here
at work making stupid fucking Megaman home pages. I
would be on the professional Robot Masters tour with Fred Savage and his retarded brother,
playing other Mega Man pros for top dollar.
||Skull Man. This robot was created through a sacreligious and
disgusting ceremony involving electrical engineering and necromancy.
Wily hired Skeletor to design Skull Man's costume, and Wood Man to
design the incredible Skull Shield that has the amazing ability to make
skulls fly around his body. Oh yes, this time they won't be
stopped. They came up with a brilliant idea of making an evil
robot and sticking him inside an empty room. Now the world
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Use the Crucifix Slash you got from Jesus
Man to show this undead monstrosity the true power of love!
|Toad Man. It's kind of hard to take a guy seriously when you can
slaughter him with your Pea shooter and he looks like a big frog muppet.
"No! Toad Man great! He give you Rain Frush!" And what the hell is a
Rain Flush? That sounds like some sort of gutter drainage device, not
something you'd fight evil robots with. And shouldn't Toad Man be
carrying like Wart Gun or Hop Boots or some shit like that? Not
that I'm complaining, I just want to ride my dog, get equipped with
Bubble Lead and fight for everlasting peace.
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Even though he's completely
pathetic, you can make him look even weaker if you have the
Frog Scalpel you got from Biology Professor Man.
||Dust Man. This guy is a big vacuum cleaner on reverse. And
although Wily is famous for some really stupid robot ideas, this one is
probably the worst. If you're conquering the world, you send this
guy to clean the fucking leaves off the side walk and let the real
robots fight Mega Man. "I'm Dust Man! I have the Dust Crusher!" Loser.
You fucking leaf blowing loser.|
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Throw Bright Man's big light bulb head on
the ground. When it shatters, Dust Man will probably suck it all up, and
the broken glass will tear up his bag. While he's changing bags, shoot
|Drill Man. After years of independent contracting, he was hired as
an evil robot master by the well lubricated Wily. Drill Man loves making
holes in wood and steel to make the use of various fasteners easier. He
met Hard Man at an autograph booth during a Makita Power Tools
convention and the two became fast friends. They enjoy quiet nights
alone together and often hold hands in church. That lovable Drill Man
is always ready with a smile for his friends and loved ones. Drill Man,
drill your way into my heart!
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Cross the streams. Duh.
||Dive Man. This was the winner of the "Six and under Evil
Robot Naming Contest." Congratulations to Timmy Powers, the lovable
first grader from Kansas who sent in his robot suggestion! "I like to
dive. Swimming is fun. I think Dive is a good name for a evil robot.
When I grow up, I want to be Fire Man. Tell Rush I want to pet him.
Thanks! Bye!" No, thank you, Timmy, for making Mega Man's life a
little bit harder. And good luck in being Fire Man! We're behind
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Pretend Dive Man is really hard.
It makes Timmy feel better.
|Bright Man. He's sort of just like Flash Man, but "Bright Man" is more
descriptive of the mental prowess of the Mega Man Robot Naming
Committee. You get the Flash Stopper for beating him, which is
suspiciously similar to Flash Man's Time Stopper. I know. It's all
very confusing. But my theory is that Bright Man is just Flash Man
after he removed his head and screwed in a giant light
HINTS ON BEATING HIM: Bright Man will try to flirt with
you a little bit to distract you. It almost worked on me once,
but I don't think I'm into the giant transparent glass heads.
But if you are, you should be extra careful.