By Chris Ross
"Now to explain my art: A friend of mine once caught an adoracubby in the park. It was busy eating a dead horse when he found it and so he was able to sneak up on it. As soon as he grabbed the adorable creature it began to cry and beg for its life, but my friend didn't listen. Soon the rainbow on the adoracubby's chest started to move and put my friend in a trance. My friend was then unable to move and he had to watch in fear as the adoracubby grew large, sharp teeth and began to eat him too. He would have been totally devoured had the being known only as "Him" not entered the clearing where they were. The being known only as "Him" quickly slew the adoracubby by decapitating it and shoving a large stick through its head. He informed my half eaten friend that this was the only way to stop pure evil. The being known only as "Him" then told my friend that the adoracubbies were so evil, that they made him look like a pussy. That is why the being known only as "Him" travels the world decapitating adoracubbies and shoving large pointy sticks through their heads. Then he left my friend to die from the wounds that the adoracubby inflicted upon him."

"The only reason I know of this tale is because I found the adoracubby's corpse and staked head next to my friend's bloody remains. And my friend had written this very story I just told you in the dirt with his own blood that pooled all around him. I never had to return his Playstation that I borrowed :)."