The only thing lamer than Volto's name is his giant upturned collar and cock-shaped hat. And I don't know why he made his paper boy, Jimmy, his sidekick. I guess since he was from Mars, the kid could convince Volto that his ability to fart the alphabet was a super power. But strangely, this ability, along with what Volto innocently calls "Jimmy's perfect pillow-like ass," has come in very handy on many of their fantastic missions. Like the time Jimmy farted against Alphabeto for the fate of the galaxy in a bicycle horn ad. But today is not one of those lucky times where a noisy ass comes in handy, so Volto has to use his magnetic power to save the "white people." Jimmy awkwardly hides in the background doing what he does, and after the save, steps out of the noxious cloud of his own making to offer Volto a box of Grape Nuts. According to him, it's a great way to recharge magnetic devices and martians. Yeah, I thought that was pretty stupid too, until I ate four bowls of the gravel in a row. Now my head is stuck to the god damn refrigerator. Anyone interested in joining the Volto from Mars fan club is encouraged to learn to fucking read. Back to the Stupid Comics Page