In Vegas I made a cocktail in the hypodermic needle depository and kept complaining to JL that it tasted like AIDS.

At Big Lots, they get you excited about their products by having a cutout of Coach's Jerry Van Dyke poke his head out from behind them and scream, "IS THIS PLACE GREAT OR WHAT!?" Which isn't really notable until here, where he crawled out of a bin of huge panties and changed the face of retail comedy forever.

Ai and I, bad motherfuckers.

My best pal Anthony and I get interrupted during our fifteenth and ninety-eigth beers, respectively.

Outside of Cancun at La Plaza De Toros. Fans of insane slaughter will want to look slightly to my left to see an assistant matador digging out the brains of an almost dead bull with a knife.

Down in San Francisco with Ashley.

From left to right: Rich, luscious ass, Bad Candy Mark, luscious ass, luscious ass.

Big Red and I perform a reenactment of an oversized lawn gnome robbery.

Me during my pro wrestling debut as Captain Party in a triple threat match against The Spaniard and Major Madness. Wrestling historians take note: I got eliminated first, but later used dirty tricks to sneak back into the match and destroy them with a little thing that goes by the name of THE TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER.

After the match, I drank beer out of a hat and bled out of the many new holes I had kicked into me.


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