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9: Strip Fighter 2
Turbo Grafix 16



If you can get off to a woman wearing a snake for underwear and getting stomped on by highheels, then I hope you're reading this from inside something with a good lock on it.
This is a tit-based spoof of Street Fighter 2. Karate women face off in a pit fighting tournament where the winner takes home naked pictures of other women. Like in all fighting games, they come from varied backgrounds and cultures. There's a girl in a swimsuit and matching bird-shaped hat, a fat pro wrestler, a ballerina in her lingerie, and a woman who's just wearing a snake. Unlike other games where they come together for the glory of victory or the conquering of some retarded combat dimension thing, the fighting spirit that binds these noble warrior souls together is the fact that most of their martial art techniques revolve around showing their panties to one other.

Eroticism: 3/10
There were a lot of half-naked people already in Street Fighter 2, so the actual game doesn't even seem unusually erotic. Yes, I understand there is something wrong with an industry when a group of women kicking the crap out of each other in thongs is totally normal, but fuck that; I'm not a sociologist. I'm just telling you that probably nothing in this game is going to turn you on until you win a picture of a naked girl. Unfortunately, that's when it gets a little bit creepy. Before the camera pans down her strategically blurred body, there's an inept attempt by the graphic artists to make it look like the girl's winking at you. A stupid graphic of an eyelid slides over one eye then disappears. And I don't know if you've ever seen anyone wink without moving the rest of their face, but it looks less like flirting and more like a horrible sleepy-wakey baby doll with a broken eyeball.


Since it's hard to stay awake through a whole fight, you can usually only tell if you've won if you get a winking naked woman afterwards. And depending on how starved you are for pornography, that's probably not enough motivation to keep playing.
Nudity Challenge: 7/10
You only earn pictures of naked women if you beat the game on a high level of difficulty, and the fact that each character has a total of three possible attacks makes it hard to keep your enemies guessing. Not only does the computer AI know exactly what you're going to try to hit it with, your kicks also show it everything it wants to know about your vagina and areas within it. Not that it matters; by the end of the fight, its slutty karate groin won't have any secrets either. But besides the lack of fighting moves, Strip Fighter 2's controls are so unresponsive, you usually can't tell which of the women you're supposed to be controlling. I forgot, am I the Fatty or the bird-headed Indian? And more importantly, how in the name of balls can I masturbate to either?

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