Directed by: Chris Columbus
Written by: It doesn't matter. The story was old when Corey Haim made a movie about it.
Starring: Robin Williams, Sally Field, Pierce Brosnan, Harvey Fierstein
Seanbaby: In man-dressed-as-woman movies, there are a few universal situations. Like when the "woman" ends up wowing everyone in a sports game, or when the "woman" runs into that one man with a fetish for beefy, hairy, ugly women and gets hit on by him. Also, their fake boobs catch fire 2 or 3 times. Mrs. Doubtfire had all of those, but forgot to included the most important theme: Men are better than women. See, in these movies, half of the script has to be based around men-disguised-as-women being better in every way to regular women. No matter how twerpy the guy is, he's one dress away from being woman of the year. It might be because people in movies aren't used to seeing girls do anything but trip and scream. Or it might have to do with the fact that in real life, women aren't as good as men at anything.
In Big Momma's House, Martin Lawrence in a dress (and prosthetic old woman suit) is an unstoppable basketball star. And Martin Lawrence is barely 5'8" and a noisier, blacker version of Howie Mandel. I honestly think that with a good disguise, Howie Mandel, Martin Lawrence, and the legless guy from Forrest Gump could lead a team to the WNBA championship. If you're still not convinced, in Corey Haim's Just One of the Girls, Corey Haim (disguised as a cheerleader) is told by his music teacher that he has a really good ear for music... for a girl. That's right, it's not just sports. Girls aren't even good at music.
And keep in mind that the people kicking so much ass in these movies are Robin Williams, Martin Lawrence, and Corey Haim. Corey Haim. If someone was to dress up Jean Claude van Damme as a woman, she'd get elected Mayor of the World by the end of the afternoon.
Fun Fact: Corey Haim's Just one of the Girls was almost scene-by-scene identical to Mrs. Doubtfire and came out one year earlier. That means that not only was Mrs. Doubtfire a near-exact remake of hundreds of movies, one of them was a Corey Haim movie. So again, good choice AFI. You fucking pansies.
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles
Directed by: John Hughes
Written by: John Hughes
Starring: Steve Martin, John Candy, Kevin Bacon, Michael Mckean
Seanbaby: I think it was Career Opportunities or Curley Sue when John Hughes movies stopped being good. And it wasn't a small drop in quality like when Shannon Tweed quit doing full frontal. He went from hilarious to retarded in a matter of months. The only thing that could cause that is a lobotomy, but that doesn't make any sense since lobotomized people are really funny. Who can forget the classic lobotomized joke, "glbglbTHHBBBB! mmmggRARBLE!!!"?